One would automatically think that there is nothing wrong with sending sympathy flowers to anyone when a family member passes away, however, in some situations it can cause conflict in homes, making the already sensitive issue even more so.

Here are some flower etiquette questions to ask yourself before sending flowers that will help to eliminate any awkward situations.

Is your ex in a new relationship and do you get along with your ex’s new partner?
Depending on your current relationship with your ex and their new partner will determine where the sympathy flowers should be sent. If you are in good standings with your ex but not so much the new partner you can send sympathy flowers to either the home or funeral home as long as you include the new partner’s name on the gift card. If your ex is not in a new relationship, and you are in good standings, you can send sympathy flowers anywhere. If you and your ex are in ill standings, have the sympathy flowers delivered to the funeral home with the card attached not singling out anyone person, but rather “to the family of”.

Where you close to the family member that passed away?
If you were close to the family member of the ex that passed away and remained that way after the split with your ex then it is appropriate to send funeral flowers to the funeral home or sympathy flowers to the home with the card addressed to the family. If you were not close to the family member but remain in good standings with the ex, you can send sympathy flowers to the home, just make sure if your ex is in a new relationship to address the new partner as well in the card.

Lastly, ask yourself if your new partner feel offended? More than likely they won’t be, but if your new partner has always been uncomfortable with your relationship with your ex, they may. If that is the case and they have strong feelings against you sending flowers to an ex at a time of loss, you probably shouldn’t send them if you value your new relationship. However, it may make an uncomfortable partner feel more comfortable by including their name on the card when sending sympathy flowers, as well as addressing the card to the family of, rather than just the ex.

Life brings on many ups and downs, with one of the most solemn times being when a loved one passes. It can appear impossible to console a person who has lost someone close to them. The biggest way people express their sympathy and regret to the existing family members is through flowers. Funeral flowers or sympathy flower arrangements can range from enormous wreath and special arrangements to vase options and plants.

A common thought amongst people, especially anyone new to sending funeral flowers, is what exactly should one send or how much should one spend on funeral flowers. There are numerous different funeral and sympathy flower arrangements available with Brant Florist. The amount you spend plays factor on what you have available and who it is you are honoring. Generally, the closer the connection to the deceased, the bigger the arrangement but again, finances can come into play. There is no real right or wrong, it is more the show of support that matters then the dollar amount spent.

There are some flower arrangements that are more traditionally associated with funeral such as:

Bouquets

Standing Wreaths

Standing Sprays

Inner casket pieces

Casket sprays

Any of those are a tasteful way of showing your love and support and will be welcomed.

Another concern for those new to having to send funeral flowers is where to send them to – the family home or the funeral home. Depending on the arrangement you are having delivered plays a role in where to have them sent. Bouquets, vases, and plants are usually sent to the residence to be displayed throughout the home however can be sent to either location. When you are attending the funeral in person, sometimes the flowers you send make for an easy conversation starter for the family grieving such as thanking one for the lovely flowers sent. If they are at the home, the grieving family may not be aware of them yet. Standing wreaths, casket sprays, and large floral arrangements are more appropriately sent to the funeral home, especially if you are wanting them to be transported the burial.

Regardless of what funeral flowers you choose, they will be appreciated by the family in mourning and a way of showing your support in their time of loss and need.

I came a cross and interesting article on Washington Post.com that I felt appropriate and important to share with everyone. It is in regards to sending funeral flowers.

Hints From Heloise
Posted Monday, January 25, 2010; 12:00 AM

An Address for Those Left Behind

Dear Heloise: You had a column about putting ADDRESSES ON FUNERAL FLOWERS. You were right on, and I’ll add a few hints.

My sister died, and her children had no idea who some of the people were, and neither did we siblings. People had signed only their first names to cards, with no return address of further identity. We would suggest adding a bit of a note with some extra information, such as “Jane Doe, a sorority sister from college,” etc. My mother received a card with a monetary gift signed only “Margaret.” We had no idea which Margaret, and the postmark was not helpful. We felt terrible that we could not return a thank-you. — Kathy H., Nebraska

My condolences on losing your sister. It’s a very hard time, and trying to take care of sending thank-you notes can be difficult. Readers, please sign your full name, especially if you are not a close friend or relative. — Heloise

The point made in this helpful hint in sending funeral flowers is an absolute truth. However, anytime you send flowers to someone in replace of your presence, may it be a funeral, baby shower wedding, or another event, the same information that were mentioned in the Washington Post Heloise column should be followed as well.

Design Your Own Arrangement

Positive customer feedback: “I wanted to pass on how pleased I am with your service. I wanted to send a formal arrangement for a funeral and I had to place my order online.  I had a specific idea of what I wanted and I couldn’t find what I was looking for on any of the popular florist websites, so I Googled “Design your own arrangement” and your website came up. I specified exactly what I wanted, named my price, and the arrangement that was delivered to the funeral home was perfect, exactly what I had in mind. Thank you!”

The above feedback message was received today from a customer who was intelligent enough to Google exactly what she wanted and she was able to accomplish exactly that.  Why are most folks satisfied with clicking on images created to sell them on a design? Do they not know that all flower arrangements are created by hand by a floral designer using flowers and other materials on hand at the time the order is being made? Do they think someone pushes a button on a machine and it manufactures an exact duplicate of the image they clicked on?  Do they think that every flower shop has in stock every flower variety and every color shown in the millions of images on the web?  Are they that naive?  Where is the common sense? (more…)

Why sending flowers to a funeral is so important

I was at a funeral once, when the pastor delivering the service told the following story.

There were quite a few flowers at the front of the chapel and he began by saying that flowers were a reminder of the person whose life we were celebrating. He said flowers follow the life cycle of a human and that we were fortunate to have so many beautiful flowers to admire.

Both start with a seed and both required lots of attention during the early phase of their life. Next comes a maturing time as each develops into adulthood.  The plant moves into the flowering stage as the ultimate show for survival just as humans do from about the age of 25 to perhaps 50.  Both shine during this period and everybody admires their talent, their beauty and their contribution to our lives. During this time, both set the foundation for survival of the species. The plant initiates the beginning of seeds via the flowers and humans raise children. Then, both move into the final phase of their life………wilting and withering in old age until the end comes. (more…)